Tuesday, 11 October 2011

Grateful

A photo that has bugger all to do with the words in this post!!


I've retyped my opening sentence a dozen times. The words will not come, at least they aren't as eloquent as I need them to be, therefore I shall plough on saying it all badly....

I've just finished reading Little Cotton Rabbits post today and I feel like I want the whole world to read it, especially the plea at the very end.

Many of you may have read that Big Cuckoo struggles due to a rogue gene. He has a degree of learning difficulties that affects every element of his developement. He does brilliantly despite this, he really is quite inspiring. Every milestone is eventually reached, only it is much later than his peers. But I do worry about him, I worry about his health and his future. Every day, like Julie, I grieve for the future he wont have that his brothers can take for granted. My feelings are echoed in the post I have just read but I am grateful that the things I deal with daily are nothing in comparison. So very grateful that my son will more than likely have an adulthood, that on the surface, is not so different to other men. I am truly grateful for that. Grateful for my special son and all the opportunities he will have because he is so lucky to not be more crippled by his condition.

xxx

20 comments:

  1. I have sat here these past few minutes wondering exactly what to put down here in this little box. I could say so much but will keep it short. I think.......yes.........grateful is word I would use too. As a person who tends to air on the negative rather than positive, I have tried these past few years to always spend a few minutes each morning or evening thinking about how lucky I am. On the days when the kids are at each others throats, when they all get over excited when they are out (and I hide with complete embarrassment), when they cannot sit still and leave the their toys all over the house, when they refuse to go to bed and give me lip, and I wish they would be better behaved..........I remind myself, that there is someone out there, who would give anything to have that in their children. And I am grateful for it all. I have an immense admiration for any parent that has to cope with such difficult circumstances.......and I hope that more awareness in society can make things just a little easier for a parent to cope with. Very moving x

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  2. I have a Toby too and at the moment we are worried due to his development. He's not yet two but he is exhibiting some signs of mild autism - we are just going through the motions currently with waiting for appointments. I have of course been reading up on autism recently and read a lot of stories that have touched both mine and my partner's hearts. We are committing to helping in some way as we have had some great help from charities recently. It's scary at the moment as it's all the unknown. All I know is that I love him intensely and will do all I can to help him.
    Lovely post & a lovely new blog, Little Cotton Rabbits for me to check in with.

    Sam xx

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  3. yep, I'm with Sarah B, nothing to say but sending great big squishy cyber hugs your way

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  4. Virtuals Hugs to everyone
    Julie xxxxxxxx

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  5. I read Julie's post this morning with an ache in my heart, for her and her little boy and for all those other parents that have to deal with similar situations. I agree with all the comments made by Coco Rose ~ I cannot even begin to imagine what it must be like for a parent to have to deal with such issues everyday and your post and Julie's post made me take a step back and be grateful for all the little everyday things about my kids that I normally take so much for granted. Thank you for sharing your thoughts ~ Jackie x

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  6. I've read it too, I am incredibly grateful to have two healthy happy children. All I can say is big hugs to everyone xxx

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  7. What a poignant blog post from Little Cotton Rabbit. Not read her blog before so thanks for sharing. Really hit home - I count my blessings every single day and things like this re-enforce it. Big hugs to all, as Moo and Mouse said above.
    P.S. Today got extremely busy and my boss was at work all day so I thought I'd better not call from there. Not professional! Out all day tomorrow: school run, toddler group, breast feeding group, school run, then round to Gabi's for tea and not back til late. Then bed, bath, school stuff. Me eat, crash out in bed. Gah!
    Did you phone for anything in particular or general chat?

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  8. I read little cotton rabbits today and I felt sad. I mostly felt sad that we contribute to making her situation even worse by our reaction to children like Toby. Some weeks ago now, I saw a woman on the bus whom I shall never forget. She had two teenagers with her and it was clear they both had autism (at least from what I know of the condition). Her son became distressed and somewhat noisy. Most people ignored what was going on (is this the best thing? I don't know). However, a man pushed past them saying 'why don't you shut the **** up?' People started to laugh. I was outraged by everyone. Would I have said or done anything? I don't know, the woman who I had not been able to see until this point got off the bus too, with the man still shouting which upset the boy even more. I noticed this poor woman more than anything else. It was as if she too was in her own world caring for these children of hers, she looked utterly bereft and desperate and as if she didn't really belong in the world we all inhabit. She looked completely frazzled and out of it, with the weight of the whole world upon her soldiers. She didn't say a word. I don't blame her as the man was rather frightening. I wondered how often she has to cope with that scenario. I thought about her long and hard. She is exactly like the sad incidences we have been reading about. A silent statistic until our attention is drawn for horrendus reasons in the press.

    We give no respite to carers, we give them a pittance to do the job single handed, when a whole team of professionals would otherwise need to be engaged and also get paid appropriately for. They are hugely exploited. It doesn't matter that these are relatives; one person can only be expected to do so much. Yet we expect them to go on relentlessly 24 hours a day, year after year. We don't recognise or notice the work they do. Out of sight and out of mind. It makes me mad. We make things worse by name calling and rediculing anyone we don't understand as behaving just like ourselves. We have child carers; we have the elderly looking after the infirm. I know an older lady of 83 who is full time carer of a friend with alzheimer's. She gets so little help and any she does get is from volunteers, not the state. It is an outrage!

    Yet it is up to us all to change things; we have so little tolerance for what is different. We make things worse than they need to be. We need to change our own attitudes and teach our own children to be more caring too. Hell really is other people. Some is undoubtedly ignorance but some is just plain unkindness. But can't both of those be changed if we want? Furthermore, instead of condemning the disabled as society is currently engaged in doing, can't we behave like the civilized nation we are supposed to be and fund proper care and respite for all that need it?

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  9. Sorry, that should read shoulders not soldiers!

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  10. Today I am grateful for you......thank you for sharing your story and Little Cotton Rabbits. I feel so sad when I hear of people treating others with such disrespect. That old saying 'Walk a mile in their shoes' should be something that we all rememmber when we become judgemental about others. I have a friend who has an autistic son, she has had a lot of success with high potency vitamin syrup and diet, he is able to attend mainstream school etc. You know how I feel about your parenting, I think you and Mr C are amazing, you give so much love to your boys.
    The more aware we become and the more grateful we become the more it ripples out to the world, the powers that be really need to stop thinking profit all the time and start thinking humanity and community.
    xoxo Sandi

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  11. Thank you honey for sharing your story. I have just read both posts and am in tears. You are both amazing women and I just want to send my love. It's hard to know what else to say, but I would like to say thank you again. This time it's a thank you for putting things into perspective for me. After a day of being grumpy with my fighting children, it has given me a much needed reminder that life could be very different and I should be grateful. Take care hon. Leah xx

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  12. I have read the post and skimmed down the comments and I have to repeat the ones above when I write I don't really know what to say.

    It was a really amazing post and I read part of the little cotton rabbits post too. They're both very emotional and heartfelt and it is so great to hear your stories. I think I need to go away and mull over what I've read. Thank you so much for sharing.

    Lizzy x

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  13. I have just read Cotton Rabbits post and i have to say i shed a tear i would like to follow her journey through her blog but couldn't find the follow button. Sending you a big hug, dee xx

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  14. Julie has been a lovely bloggy friend of mine for a while now and I think the dignity with which she deals with what life has dealt her is amazing. Sharing her experiences with others hopefully will make other people more aware of the lives that some peole have to lead, through no fault of their own.
    Thank you too for bravely sharing your story as well, making others aware and standing up for your beautiful children is the best thing you can do.
    Vivienne x

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  15. Nice post and I wrote you an email about it yesterday. Little Cotton Rabbits is one of my favourite blogs - lovely lady.

    This is completely and utterly insignificant given the content of your post but... oh my... I love your china. Sorry for being superficial.

    xxxx

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  16. I'm so glad you posted the link to Julie's blog.
    Beautiful and touching.
    Thank you.
    X

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  17. Cuckoo, your writing was beautiful and you indeed did find your words, because I am moved. So nice that you added the link as well. This was a much needed post and I thank you for that.
    Hugs Hugs Hugs
    susie

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I L♡VE your comments. Thank you ever so for taking the time. I do try to get back to everyone but I am rather scatty and I have these 3 big distractions....(and I'm just generally a bit rubbish lately, so please don't feel obliged to leave a note) Sorry about the word verification too, too much spam.